Im Not Mad At You!!!!!!! By Kayundra Simpson

I'm Tired.........I"m Tired... I'm Tired......

Do you know what it's like to be without a car, house, a job and no money but have faith.. I"m telling you ask God why he is taking you through.. I know why he took me through . He told me he had to retrain me.. So that I would stop depending on a MAN and start depending and trusting on HIM... God had to teach me that he is my provider and that he would supply all my needs. I kept getting in the way trying to do it on my own.. I told God from this moment on I am going to be still.. I'm tired of repeating the same test.. Lord I release I give you all of me. No more sugar daddies... I have a sugar daddy as long as I can remember and I thought that worked for me.. Because I didn't have to commit.. lord I trust you..


See all that comes with a price and its to expensive. I'm more then my hips and thighs or whats between my legs... I require so much more. Even if that means losing everything, giving up everything and starting over. Even if that means being homeless.. When you get sick and tired of being sick and tired you do something different. I don't care about anyone talking about me or laughing at me.. I'm doing whats best for me. I have watched some of my closest friend marry my x boyfriends.. I've watch people that said they were for me only be around for what I could do for them.....Or in a better terms for my contacts.. as I step into my own as a child of God and grown woman.. I demand so much more.. I have raised my Bar and refuse to let it down again.. To fit or meet the approval of others.. So go ahead and talk and laugh.. What God is getting ready to do for me I will say it will all be worth it..


I got tired of being the other woman, I got tired of being with the different men, I got tired of the different spirits in me, on me and around me.. I got tired of someone doing something for me then throwing it up in my face. I got tired of having the thrill, the money, and then still feeling alone, lonely,hurt, nasty, and disappointed... I got tired of you have some big titties, nice lips.. Well your not telling me something I don't no, is that all you see when you look at me.. I got tired of just good sex or trying to turn out the next because I figure I could.. Because I was labeled as a BAD WOMAN... To prove what to who.. for a nut that may have lasted minutes...So once I did all this then what.. COme on now.. I tired.....Getting drunk to the point where I can't remember but I call myself a lady.. No one holding me accountable but giving me more drinks like that was cute.. Yet I am responsible for my own actions. Picking up a bottle was my excuse no it was what I called my courage but in the end.. All it did was really make me speak my mind even more than I already do.. What I look like chosen a man but that was that aggressiveness coming out...I AM NOT A MAN... So yeah its time I stop acting like one.. I carried so much hurt and pain.. Not anymore.. I'm walking in my destiny....


Its funny I call or text it may take him a couple of days to respond, but as soon as I text and say I need some then it seems as if I don't get the whole text out before I get a reply.. Noooooo I'm tired of being a door mate, used and abused.


Its not a good feeling to feel you have no one and yeah, its plenty of times I feel this way.. but I can say through it all I know I have Jesus if I don't have anyone else.... I had a wake up call today that changed my life.... It wasn't nothing but GOD that the act wasn't carried out.. You see I damn near RAPED today by someone I thought was my FRIEND.. I was in a situation and because they felt I was in a situation they thought they could take advantage of me. But my God interceded on my behalf.. So I owe him my life. I"m TIRED...


Funny thing is I reached out to a couple of people only one picked up and it was one that don't know me from Adam.. Yet they were there to motivate me through what I was going through... As I finish this.. I leave today just where it is.. There is nothing else I need to speak on or about this situation....


You should never have to lower your standard for someone. I learned a very valuable lesson out of this.. I see why GOD chose ME...

So I'm stripping myself of people ole things and things that are not helping me walk in to my destiny. I was told I would never be nothing, never amount to anything.... I still hear those words ring in my ear like a bell. I had a nerves break down felt like my life was over and I just didn't want and couldn't live anymore.. Devil you are a liar God didn't take me through all of this for it not to have a meaning and for me not to be able to be a witness and a voice to someone else. I told the lord I just can't take no more.. he said its the process, I've got to process you. So who are you to judge me when you don't no what I'm going through.. I just can't take no more. So for those of you out there that don't want to go through don't want to suffer and don't want to be with out..


Let that pride GO... I'm telling you it gets old I'm not talking about something I heard I'm talking about what I've been doing for years and going through for years. I'm cleaning up my own mess and if that leave me without.. I know God will give it back to me 10 folds. With me right now God is cleaning.... Me up getting me ready for something Major.. I have ran and fought it to long.. I'm tired of running


I see the devil is really trying to take me out.. Devil you are a liar... To anyone that's truly for me and my friend respect the path that I'm on and I have chosen.. I have to do whats best for me and my life.. I can't keep going through the same thing and not passing the same test.. So its going to be times you ask me to hang out with you.. and I may decline if its not inline with where I'm trying to go.. Don't get offend... I have to do ME....Ms.K.Simpson...

Get Out Of Your Feeling

Get Out Your Feeling……… Get out your feelings I’m not in mine You really want to fall out with me about a dude this time We fam I thought we were better than that Seem like you had some feelings for the dude that you hadn't dealt with yet Keep in mind you sent him my way Said you were not interested in him in any kind of way So I stepped to him to see what he was about He was a cool dude we were vibing no doubt I don’t do drama nor do I like mess So I tell you what I’m going to do I’m going to let the both of yall rest It seems there was more going on than either one of you wanted to admit Let me Just say this I’m a grown woman and I’m not with this kind of Bulls Shit My calls and text go unanswered or when you finally respond you say you’ll call me back Yet you find time to text him and I know this for a fact But I’m your fam and we have been through a lot I can’t entertain this I absolutely will not I’m real good friends with delete unfriend and block If it really wasn't more then it appeared we would have been out toasting saying cheers So do what you do I don't have no more words for either one of you Copyright © 2013 Kayundra Simpson

Insecurities will have you miserable fix that.....

You tried to come for me so hey.... I told you I"m a writer and love how my pen flow.... Lets go


So I must be doing something right I see I'm a hot topic... for you....I was always taught that their more Miserable people out there in the world then their are HAPPY ONES... So I will make sure I wave & smile to give the Miserable people more to talk about.. This is the best FREE advertisement one can ask for.. keep up the good work.. When you down play me and talk bad your just going to send more people to check me out.. I heard A Life is on sale at Walmart...So why don't you go out and buy you one...


Thinking hmmmm you want me to minimize my intelligence in order to magnify your ignorance.. When you try to be nice to people they seem to want to take you for granted, but when you get ghetto with them they want to play the victim... Stay in your line because coming over in mines will cause you to wreck.....


Lord thank you for expanding my mind, shallow people can't hold me down with simple thoughts... When you don't forgive people, you're just basically letting someone who's no longer in your life block your blessings.. So Ms. Lady I forgive you cause your really have some major issues......you need to seek professional help for that... Leave me out of your Mess...You had issues way before he started conversing with me. If you would have been doing what you needed to be doing at home he wouldn't have been out seeking a friend to converse with.. YOu opened that door.. The thing about it. Like I told him and I'm telling you.. I can't offer you anything but a friendship... And after all this I can't offer that.


So your insecurities have gotten the best of you. I can't believe your over 40 and calling my phone like your still in elementary school... Name calling, loud talking, talking about the same old thing over and over.. Hmmmm I did that in elementary school. You really tried to make me get out of character... You keep doing what your doing... Your marriage will be over and won't be no happy every after. You're really coming after the wrong one... I refuse to deal with you and your ignorance I turn you over to God... Your drama I just don't have the time or energy to be apart of such foolishness...


Let me get this right your going through your husband phone, checking his call log calling every number that he has called or called him... Young lady please get you some class....Coming for me is something you don't want to do.. You get EXACTLY what you tolerate... I assure you I don't do drama I will let them White Folks handle you......


So you brought up things I did in my past... I put it out there.. I'm not ashame of anything I done in my PAST... I'm aware of what I did but you crossed the line when you started to bad mouth my kids... You see I could have got with you. Had your people missing you sitting up crying with a box of tissue... That would have been the easy thing to do. I had to ask myself Ms.Simpson what would Jesus do.. So name calling keep it up.. in the end you will see the best results... You're just not worth it. I've come to far to let a non factor cause me to get on here level...


This is the part that I find so amusing.. you have called my PHONE 113 time... Left 34 voice mails 1 email... You have went to my websites watched my videos and all you came up with was I was a big titty hoe, Who had a bad life, who was ugly and I wish my life would have been as good as yours.. Oh not to mention I had been to jail a few times... Hmmmm you really need to go seek you some help.. Get that checked out because that's really not normal. I see now who really is my number one fan. Your calling me private but leaving voice mails lol you go create a dummy email so you can email me.. but I had a bad life wow....


Let me address this I don't want your husband nor do I have any dealing with him...Your husband called me talking about you.. How he wanted to make his marriage work... How he didn't understand why you didn't appreciate him... You have a good man but that foolishness your doing. Your going to push him right into the arms of another woman.. A person is only going to put up with something for so long. He and I were friends no more no less.. Like I told him and you.. Its best he not call me no more and you either.. Now you heard this conversation... Sweetie why are you still calling my phone.. So your calling me 1 & 2 a clock in the morning.. He is not with me...You're really running up the wrong tree.. I really feel sorry for you. What I don't take lightly are threats... Even then I want stoop down to your level.. So go ahead post what you want say what you think my hurt me or my character.. Your fighting a losing battle before you even get started.


If one have to do all of that and that's their Husband something is seriously wrong. I never let people driven by drama derail me off my path to my destiny...What you need to do is treat your man right because what you see as worthless another woman will worship... Never get to the place where you can't be told noting cause you only setting yourself up for failure. Never give up on something you an't go a day without thinking about..


As I end this.. To my fans & followers.... Don't be crippled by the comments of your critics. Your character will always be revealed during times of conflict. I'm allergic to ignorance and haters...People that don't understand your struggle will try to undermine your success...Never let people infect your intelligence with their insecurity and ignorance.....

Where did you come from...

Where did you come from...

 You came in when no one was suppose to be here

 You didn't come in with hidden motto's you stayed consistent and sincere

 You held my hand every step of the way

 Told me to keep my head up there would be brighter and better days

 You didn't try to take advantage of my situation

 Even though my life was turn up side down you were very patience

You saw in me what I didn't see in myself

 I will love you to the day I die...for you I will give my last breath

 You taught me how to love again 

You waited patiently for my heart to mend

 But what I like the most you became my very best friend

 I was broken and you knew that

 You rode with me every step of the way and had my back

 When I didn't have a dime to my name

 I never had to ask you for one little thang

 You stayed on point your words and actions always Align

 I'm riding with you till the end of time

 You call and check on me throughout my day

 If I don't sound right your coming right away

 When your name pops up in my phone

 I get all Getty inside... Man you got me so gone...

 I love you and those are words I haven't told a Man in a long time

 You caught me at a good place and time

 I"m in my prime...Aging like fine wine....

 Submissive not something I normally do

 It just flows so natural when I'm with you

 I like how you lead but keep me right at your side

 But the most memorial moment was when you asked me to be your bride...

 Copyrights©2013 Kayundra Simpson

Fair Weather Friend

You don't really fool with ME if you go days...not a word, text, call no nothing when were suppose to be close...See when I was down going through my storm. You became Casper the friendly ghost..Disappeared At a time I really needed you the most... Now that I'm on my way back up don't say a word,make a call or send a text... I assure you we are no longer close..
People if they can't be there when your down..then why when your up your still letting those Fair Weather Friends come around...... Fair weather friends I just can no longer do.. I'm drain and so over you...If your feeling some type of way about this..... Then it's probably about you.. I went through my phone deleted 465 contacts.... Now I'm down to 10.. If you can't reach me you no what it is then...

I have no room in my life for Fair Weather Friends..I'm not mad at you I assure you that. I'm just on a different Journey and not looking back... I don't need anything or anyone in the way of my Destiny and that statement right there is a fact...I'm glad I went through this ordeal thank you Jesus........for revealing those Fair Weather Friends and showing me the ones that was Real. .It wasn't just the for the Fair Weather Friends it was some Family too.... Oh trust me I didn't forget bout you....Some may of you are cut off too. If your words and actions don't align... You are diffidently a waste of my Time....I'm on a different level and I'm staying to myself... If its not positive you can go to he left...

Now do you really know what that mean... A friend who is only a friend when circumstances are pleasant or profitable. At the first sign of trouble, these capricious, disloyal friends will drop their relationship with you. A friend who is only around when they need you. A friend who is only nice to you when it's convenient. Someone who's wishy-washy. Someone who is a "backstabber." Someone who abandons you in certain situations. I'm sure some of you have some in your circle.. I can no longer do them.. With Growth comes Maturity... I cant have things or people in my life that don't benefit it in some kind of way ...


I've lost a lot of people in my life friends/family.....and I'm not afraid to lose another one. I absolutely do not have time nor can I entertain nonsense...I had to do some cleaning up...



Cant continue to care about fair weather friends. Especially when there is nothing but static coming back from their direction. Friendships take effort,  what do you suppose to do when all the effort comes from one side only? The second I hit less than sunny times. They evaporated. No longer hanging out. Only called once by mistake in the last 6 months or so. No replies to emails or texts. Does not take a genius to see what is going on.So. I stopped trying to hang out. I stopped calling, because I felt like I was a hassle for them to talk to. I stopped emailing, texting, calling ect.... I stopped trying. Have a great day everyone...Ms.K.Simpson

Focused.....

 It's amazing how when I went to jail  what a difference it really made. Jail is not for everyone... Yet when I got locked up I could see things a lot clearer..After I saw that no one cared enough to visit me, write me or accept my call while I was gone, I changed when I got back. I didn't get mean, I got focused! Some take it as I'm being mean when really all I'm doing is staying to myself, staying focused and doing what I have to do to better me.... As I continue this journey God has me on.. I don't look at the bad things as bad anymore. I see them as lessons also a assignment that God has for me to do. In every bad thing you go through find the positive in it. God surely knows what he is doing with you. He don't make any mistakes.. 

When I got out of Jail its like my mind was on grind mode only. I only dealt with people who cared about getting money & grinding. If it wasn't about business, I had no time for it! The only thing I had to find a different kind of hustle. I wanted God to use me how ever he wanted. So I cried out not my will lord but yours.. Use me how ever you would like. When I started walking with God, certain things changed, but not everything. I still don't entertain anything that's not about something! I don't gossip or chill period! I vacation or do my hobbies, but other than that, I'm about my business! So don't don't take it as I'm acting funny. I'm just walking in the will of God.... I'm doing what I have to do to become a better me.. I'm positioning myself to allow God to use me as a vessel and to be a blessing to someone else..

I'm grateful for my new circle, my mentors, business contacts and people that saw more in me then my past..They saw something to want to give me a chance.. Atlanta is a state that its not what you know its who you know.. I just had one on my Business Contacts tell me welcome to Atlanta... All I can say the things and doors that or flying open for me. Is no one but GOD..  Don't give up on your dreams just because you get knocked down.. Keep fighting get back up.. Someone asked me with all that you have been through how do you still manage not to give up on God.. With a smile on my face he is all I have.. I love that man so much.. He knows the ending to my story, He has shown me what he has for me and I want it hold heartily .. He has never left me, he don't judge me, he is my provider the list goes on and on.. If you have not tried him... I must say your missing out... Have a great day everyone... Thanks for all your support...Ms.K.Simpson love you all..